Moving On In Peace
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Thursday, July 24, 2008
of past, of present
cleared off a lot of old files from my hard disk storage partition. spared me about another 2GB of space.
it reminded me of how much junk we can accumulate over time. well... they are not exactly junk. those files are mostly from the office where i once worked. looking back i realized how much time and energy i've put into these things, these works of mine. i tried so hard to play my role, trying to make the world a better place in the little ways i can. did they make a difference? i hope...
all seemed to eventually ate me up. so much of my life was given away, with full sincerity, with just hope, that it will make life better for someone else out there. why? i'm miserable, i'm in pain. i wish not others in my shoes and will do my best to prevent it. little care i had for myself. let me be worn out. let me be used up. sooner the better. after all, these are the only reasons i stayed. see, how little love, if none i've for myself.
let it all be done. just let me go. let me go home. i'm tired. Father...
it reminded me of how much junk we can accumulate over time. well... they are not exactly junk. those files are mostly from the office where i once worked. looking back i realized how much time and energy i've put into these things, these works of mine. i tried so hard to play my role, trying to make the world a better place in the little ways i can. did they make a difference? i hope...
all seemed to eventually ate me up. so much of my life was given away, with full sincerity, with just hope, that it will make life better for someone else out there. why? i'm miserable, i'm in pain. i wish not others in my shoes and will do my best to prevent it. little care i had for myself. let me be worn out. let me be used up. sooner the better. after all, these are the only reasons i stayed. see, how little love, if none i've for myself.
let it all be done. just let me go. let me go home. i'm tired. Father...
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
toilet accident
fell down with full impact on my right arm this morning. upper right arm is presently immobile, shoulder down to elbow. the rest seems fine. aching badly though...
i'm obviously have not been in a clear mind, called up bro after to ask for help, forgot that he is not a local so dunno which doctor to go... gee... head been foggy for the past 2 weeks... i'll just wait for a few days, if it does not get better only see doctor.
on the positive side, i discovered i can still type. i just need to drag my right arm with the left and rest the palm on the keyboard. but having to drag it to the mouse.... such trouble just to switch between mouse and keyboard control...
well, since i can still code, back to work anyway, workaholic as i am...
reminder to self: when u r using bleach, things become slippery, so watch out!
i'm obviously have not been in a clear mind, called up bro after to ask for help, forgot that he is not a local so dunno which doctor to go... gee... head been foggy for the past 2 weeks... i'll just wait for a few days, if it does not get better only see doctor.
on the positive side, i discovered i can still type. i just need to drag my right arm with the left and rest the palm on the keyboard. but having to drag it to the mouse.... such trouble just to switch between mouse and keyboard control...
well, since i can still code, back to work anyway, workaholic as i am...
reminder to self: when u r using bleach, things become slippery, so watch out!
Friday, June 27, 2008
ubuntu studio boot load hang
I attempted installation of Ubuntu Studio a few days ago after reading how it's meant more for multimedia developer like i am. Didn't turn out good... the system itself is good, just that it always hang at the load screen with the fancy Ubuntu Studio loading bar.
Turning off the quiet mode of the load screen i figured the error came about at "saving VESA state". There goes again my crappy S3 chipset graphic card. Funny there is no problem with this when i boot into recovery mode and opt for "resume normal boot". My best guess this has something to do with the fancy splash screen itself, something with it conflict with my fancy ancient 32MB graphic card. Solution? I have not figured a perfect one, so this is what i did:
Type the following command in terminal:
Scroll down and you will see your Grub boot option listed, something like this:
Just delete the following words: quiet, splash
and comment out the last line in the section by adding "#"
It will turn out like this:
The load for the selected (edited) Grub loader option will then be in verbose mode. No more fancy loading bar, but at least now it works!
Turning off the quiet mode of the load screen i figured the error came about at "saving VESA state". There goes again my crappy S3 chipset graphic card. Funny there is no problem with this when i boot into recovery mode and opt for "resume normal boot". My best guess this has something to do with the fancy splash screen itself, something with it conflict with my fancy ancient 32MB graphic card. Solution? I have not figured a perfect one, so this is what i did:
Type the following command in terminal:
gksudo gedit /boot/grub/menu.lst
Scroll down and you will see your Grub boot option listed, something like this:
title Ubuntu 8.04, kernel 2.6.24-19-rt
root (hd0,2)
kernel /boot/vmlinuz-2.6.24-19-rt root=UUID=31776be7-f8c0-4849-b3b8-157ab157bc7a ro quiet splash
initrd /boot/initrd.img-2.6.24-19-rt
quiet
Just delete the following words: quiet, splash
and comment out the last line in the section by adding "#"
It will turn out like this:
title Ubuntu 8.04, kernel 2.6.24-19-rt
root (hd0,2)
kernel /boot/vmlinuz-2.6.24-19-rt root=UUID=31776be7-f8c0-4849-b3b8-157ab157bc7a ro
initrd /boot/initrd.img-2.6.24-19-rt
#quiet
The load for the selected (edited) Grub loader option will then be in verbose mode. No more fancy loading bar, but at least now it works!
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
deletion
deleted my friendster account
deleted my hi5 account
deactivated my facebook account
why? is started with this:
http://roncjl.blogspot.com/2007/12/letter-to-you.html
now can i delete myself?
wish it's that easy...
deleted my hi5 account
deactivated my facebook account
why? is started with this:
http://roncjl.blogspot.com/2007/12/letter-to-you.html
now can i delete myself?
wish it's that easy...
Monday, June 9, 2008
drift
the traveling between world and selves, that's what it's been for the past weeks. how i wonder if this will ever come to an end... the journey against the tide is so tiring...
Father, You are my anchor. On You i steadfastly hold, but hold me Father all the more lest i loose. Amen.
Father, You are my anchor. On You i steadfastly hold, but hold me Father all the more lest i loose. Amen.
Thursday, June 5, 2008
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